Thursday, February 26, 2009

The Breaks

Technology is great. It makes life better, warmer, easier and more fun. Laptops mean we can easily warm our crotches, toasters mean we can make warm bread, and Twitter...Twitter allows us to tell everyone when we're not warm at all.

But it's also a pain in the ass when it's not working. 

If your laptop breaks you've got to phone someone to fix it, and even then they might not have the foggiest. It might be because of this, or that, or because you did something wrong or didn't do something right, or a whole multitude of other variables and trivialities.

Why can't things just work properly? Better, why the hell aren't we at the stage where they can fix themselves? Okay, so the toaster would need a robotic arm and a screwdriver (picture that then build me one), but couldn't computers at the very least call for help? Or send an email or something to someone who could solve the problem? Or again, robotic arm and screwdriver maybe?

Make things more robust, solid, impenetrable and immune...to everything. Dropped on the floor? No problem. Switched off the wrong way? No problem. Caught up in a hurricane and flung into the ocean? No problem- have it swim back by itself. Just do something, anything, make it work, and above all else, make sure I don't get a) upset or b) annoyed.

And get a better call centre too, because that would just be lovely.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Waiting for Week-By-Week Televisions Shows

Though they may urge one to continue living by having something to look forward to, they can also urge one to live only for the following episode.

I'd like to think of something other than Lost. I really would. But hey, come April, I'll be able to think of Fringe as well. Then come next year, and I'll also have Doctor Who to live for.

Why, TV? Whyfore you do this to me? I don't want to be a slave to my TV. It hurts so good! And your Alec Baldwin Hulu commercial only reinforces my fear.

Ah, today is sweet, sweet Wednesday. No! No, there must be something else in my brain! I must work on what I must work on, not while away the hours until 9.. glorious 9... No! No! Work!

Just give me the DVDs.